Book Review: Sarah’s Fall
Sarah’s Fall. Paula Riehle, Remedy Publishing, 5 November 2021, Paperback and eBook, 412 pages.
Reviewed by Caroline L. Huftalen.
Paula Riehle makes quite the debut as a fiction writer with her first novel, Sarah's Fall, published by Remedy Publishing. Formerly a financial professional, the only numbers Riehle is tracking now is how many lies and manipulations teenagers can keep running at once. Her coming-of-age saga all too well documents the seemingly innocent teenage years and the harsh consequences we all must face for actions we thought wouldn't cling to us for decades to come.
In Sarah's Fall, we meet a group of high school girlfriends reuniting as adults after promising to open their senior year time capsule together on that very day. The tension is sharp yet quiet, the bonds barely visible. No one wants to be there, nor has anything to talk about…yet. It isn't until we venture back in time to see the truths of what happened to create such a rift—a huge fault line still left rumbling—between the now women that we understand how lies and misplaced loyalties turn everything to wreckage. Through the loves and loves lost, the playful antics, and toxic obsessions, the reader steps back into high school and faces the mirrored flaws of youth that create patterns of insecurity in our adult years. At the heart of Riehle's novel is the exploration of the downfall of female friendship, the cutting truths, the distractions, the taunts that a man's love will suffice, and that all bonds can be broken to win that love. But can they be mended?
Riehle's ability to tap into the psyche of a teenager is near perfection. It is a true look at the inside of a 17-year-olds inner thoughts, motivations, and insecurities. The language and banter, the narcissism and need for approval, make the reader return to a time filled with nostalgia, even if some of those memories make you wince. The characters are layered and complex, each bringing something different and special to the group, yet still clinging to the lies they tell themselves, each other, and the men they covet to attempt to be what everyone else wants them to be. Riehle is able to tap into the superior mindset of a teenager with such ease as we see how the characters feel about their parents and other adults. Their critiques of image and judgment of flaws as they carefully pick out socially approved outfits and put on personality traits like makeup as they beg to be accepted.
Although in the end the characters face the truth, and some see the ongoing error of their ways and the ripple effect of their actions, the warm embrace of reparation wasn't enough of a balm to ignore the fact that the ending felt too tidy. It was too neatly wrapped up after what occurred in the 400 pages prior. There was death and deep wounds that completely overhauled these characters' life trajectories. Being a teenager is messy by our own making, being an adult is messy by the habits we nurtured as teenagers. The characters forgive for past bad choices, both themselves and each other, which is a powerful testament to the bonds we forge while young, but I was left wishing it had stopped there, with the importance being laid upon the friendships instead of the mess that boyfriends and marriage throw in. Isn't that how they got in this mess in the first place? Sarah rekindled an honest connection with her best friend, agreeing to repair what had been neglected for years. We are left rooting for Sarah despite it all because our hopes for ourselves are our hopes for her, a return to the ease and comfort of close friendship, that the promise of being that close forever isn't another lie.
Maybe in the end we are all still teenagers. Seeking approval and love where we can. Hoping our actions will be forgiven with the mild excuse of not knowing better or ignoring knowing better. We want our parents to tell us it's all going to be okay, to run to our friends with our secrets, a hand to hold, and a warm body in our beds at night to let us know that we have done it all correctly. Maybe what Riehle is really exploring is that we never really change. Our problems multiply, and our freedom seems to shrink right at the moment when we thought it would grow. But despite it all, we are simply seeking the people who will love us. Parents who still fill with pride at minor achievements; friends who laugh freely, curled together as if one body; a partner that embodies all of the before mentioned and more. In Riehle's novel and in life, it is clear that having it all, all at once is still something that requires bending, and oftentimes breaking. Just like in high school, we are sacrificing what matters most to check the boxes: ourselves and the people who always saw us for who we really were and loved us regardless.